“Assholian Factor”

Another one of my summer obsessions is the reality show, Top Chef. In the current season three, one of the contestants is an Asian fellow, Hung, who is incredibly arrogant, self-righteous and generally unlikable. Conversely, another contestant, CJ, (a 6’8”, CA native, private chef and cancer survivor) is particularly witty, providing commentary in line with my dry sense of humor.

In last night’s new episode, CJ was commenting on Hung’s performance, saying he (Hung) had a lot of talent and much going for him. “The only thing standing in his way is his ‘assholian factor.’” What a beautiful bastardization of the English language; as if to summarize such behavior by resembling it to an actual psychological condition. Brilliant.

So, next time someone treats you poorly for no reason, you pass an abercrombie douchebag in the mall, or that pompous guy at work – you know the one – goes off on yet another self-proclaiming tirade, just remember what it all can be attributed to: the assholian factor. Simply brilliant.